Saturday, September 23, 2006

Review: "Tideland"

Watching this movie is like seeing some totally slammin' chick from across the room at a party, where you're all, "Daaaamn, she's hot!" And then she whips out a cigarette and lights up. Hey, maybe that floats your boat, bucky, but from where I'm sitting that's just a huge turnoff. My body is a temple. One that is bloated and decrepit, but the rent is good and I'm tax-free. Anyway, to say that my expectations were cruelly dashed is an understatement, one that merits a metaphor that's beyond my ability to craft.

"Tideland" is based on a novel by Mitch Cullin that must not translate well to the screen. I can see why it attracted Terry Gilliam--he has a fascination with precocious kids who create or find complex fantasy worlds and whose real lives feature adults that range from the oblivious to the outright malevolent. Regardless of the merits of the source material, though, in Gilliam's hands it is transformed into a shapeless blob of not altogether compelling images that have no evident storyline whatsoever.

What we get is basically a tone poem, and if I wanted to take in that kind of Artistic Vision for Deep Thoughts, I woulda gone to "Koyaanisqatsi". It's enormously frustrating to see Gilliam viciously beat back any attempts for a plot to emerge to drive our characters forward. More or less all we have is a series of vignettes that lack the usual barrage of richly layered and evocative imagery for which Gilliam is so well known. It's ironic that he seems to have dialed back his usual eccentricities and indulgences in response to the critics' complaints, and the result is this wan and formless mess that nevertheless manages to creep along for two endless hours before sputtering to a pointless ending, pausing along the way to toy creepily with pedophilia.

Jeff Bridges and Janet McTeer have quite evident fun in their roles, and Jennifer Tilly plays against type as a blowsy idiot. The revelation here, though, is the young (eleven years old at the time!) Jodelle Ferland in the demanding role of Jeliza-Rose. Her performance is magnificent and fearless. If you have a high tolerance for ennui and nonsensical meandering, this movie is highly recommended just for her star turn alone. Otherwise, pop in the DVD of "Time Bandits" and remember the good old days.

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